Cougar Town: Lover's Touch

What Happened, Yo!:

-Travis convinces Jules that instead of worrying about him, she should be wrapped up in planning her wedding and spend all her time doing that. So Jules begins devoting most of her time to wedding planning, only to be interrupted when Travis gets into an accident while being pulled on his skateboard by dog Travis. Jules cares for Travis and tries to keep him in a good head space, planning on delaying her meltdown until after Travis is fine. Travis is worried about how this injury will affect his image and becomes more worried when he's told he has to wear a helmet for two months while his skull heals. Jules again tries to make him feel better about this, and seems to have avoided her meltdown, only for the panic to creep back when Travis says he doesn't plan on wearing his helmet at college.

-Meanwhile, the boys have invented a game called Dominance Ball, where you try to hit someone with a ball when they aren't working to assert dominance. Laurie doesn't want to play, but becomes offended when she finds out it's just for dudes. She teams up with Ellie and the pair (with help from Jules) start competing against the boys in a game of Dominance Ball that doesn't end until someone cries. The girls are ruthless, but the boys plan to fight back.

-While Laurie is talking to Travis, they throw a ball at her, but it almost hits Travis right in the skull when Jules catches it. She pleads with Travis to keep wearing the helmet, and when Travis tells her not to worry about him, she snaps that she will never stop worrying about him. She asks for him to wear the helmet so she can sleep at night and he agrees, but laurie wonders if Travis will still wear the helmet when they can't see him.

-Meanwhile Jules manic wedding planning is making Grayson long for touch and intimacy. Andy (who is used to a lack of touch and intimacy) goes from mocking him to trying to help him adjust, but Grayson still thinks he's one of Jules main priorities, until he sees he's only number 5 on Jules speed dial. Grayson starts longing for touch (Though he doesn't try to get it from the dog park, like Andy does), even from random bar patrons. Grayson and Andy lament how they wish they could get attention when they want it and then be left alone the rest of the time, when the opposite always seems to happen. Eventually though, Jules does make time for Grayson after Andy gets Grayson to act like he doesn't want it.


I Like This: Season 3 is 3 episodes old, but Lover's Touch already has a spot as one of my favorites of the season. For starters, we learned plenty of stuff about Tom that we didn't know before, making him a more three dimensional character (Though still a pretty creepy one). And Jules constantly forgetting what his last name was was quite funny. This episode also marks the debut of Travis' helmet which he apparently has to wear for several weeks because the writers hated Dan Byrd's hair last season. True story. The sight gag of Travis in the helmet may get old by the end of the season, but it works splendid right now. And the story of Travis trying to convince Jules she doesn't need to worry about him and should focus on her wedding, only for Jules to break down at the end with her touching speech about how she'll always worry about him was great and true to Jules character. She can't control Travis life anymore, but that doesn't mean she can't care about what he does in his life. And Grayson and Andy proved to be a great team this week, as Grayson grapples with his newfound need for intimacy and touch, while Andy tries to help him through it. Their "treat us like babies" conversation was full of funny moments (Andy spying on Grayson is a great idea that should be explored further) and helped to illustrate how far Grayson has come since the start of the show. And the visits to the dog park never got old.

But...: Dominance Ball turning into a battle of the sexes felt like it was from a different episode of the show completely, because outside of the last scene where it serves as the catalyst for the emotional climax, it doesn't really fit in the episode (Though it was pretty funny).

The Bottom Line: Lover's Touch was yet another great episode of Cougar Town and probably my favorite of the season so far (Though the season is only 3 episodes old.). Here's hoping this greatness streak continues!

Grade: 85% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Grayson after Jules and Travis start eating Caveman style: "Did you at least wash your hands?" Travis (in fake British accent): "Oh, the king of England wants to know if our hands are clean."

-Welcome to Cougar Town: This is not The Simpsons chalkboard bit. This is not The Simpsons chalkboard bit. This is not The Simpsons chalkboard bit.

-Laurie: "I would totally date a guy with no feet. It'd just be one less gross thing for me to deal with." Andy: "Are you trying to tell me I shouldn't wear flip-flops?" Laurie: "No. (She takes a look at Andy's feet) Oh God, yes! They're all big toes."

-Bobby: "Don't worry. D-ball is just for dudes. Laurie: "Nothing's 'just for dudes' anymore. Not NASCAR, not cigars, not even peeing standing up."

-Grayson: "We're gonna get crazy on our wedding night, aren't we?" Jules: "Oh, yeahh. (beat) Maybe. I get really tired at weddings."

-Grayson: "No woman can ignore... The Truth." Andy: "Did you just call your body 'The Truth'". Grayson: "I did and I did it unironically."

-Ellie: "Hey Tom. It's sweet you came, but why don't you leave the medical stuff to the doctors". Tom: "I am a doctor. I'm the head neurosurgeon here."

-Tom: "Do you people not even know my last name?" Jules: "Of course we know your last name. Tom Gazelian: Then say it. They just said it on the intercom two seconds ago." Ellie: "Who cares?" Laurie: "Galifanaskis?" Andy: "Gabbagabbahey?" Bobby: "Gazoo?" Jules: "Gazoinks." Tom: "You think my name is Tom Gazoinks?" Jules: "Tom, I've had a rough day. Can't I get a pass?" (They hug.) Tom: "Can I still be mad at them (motions to everyone else)" Jules: "Go nuts."

-Jules: "I am so glad you're okay." Travis: "I fractured my skull."

-Ellie: "Back in college, I was a sucker for injuries. If a guy had a scar or a missing finger or just did stuff. I miss being a ho." Laurie: "You want back in? Because we'll take you back."

-Travis: "Yeah, I'm sure panties will drop when girls find out I was being pulled by my dog on a skateboard, saw a monarch butterfly and said 'Hey, you're not native to Florida'. CRASH"

-Jules: "So Travis, you get to head back to college and jump into life like nothing ever happened." Tom: "And here's your helmet." Travis: "My what?"

-Laurie: "This is an exact replica of the helmet Amelia Airhart wore when she invented airplanes." Travis: "Uhuh" Laurie: "When her baby got stolen!" Travis: "Nope."

-Andy:"Can't even go back to being an emotionally walled-off cyborg. That's how you messed up your first marriage. Stopped sharing your feelings. Spent hours trying to fix a bread maker that wasn't broken just to avoid another silent dinner." Grayson: "How? I didn't even know you back then." Andy: "When I got bored, I'd get a chair and sit outside your window. I really liked your hair back then." Grayson: "Thanks, so did I but Jules likes it like this."

-Grayson: "I just want her to give me attention when I want it and leave me alone when I don't. Andy: "Like a baby." Grayson: "Yeah, just treat me like a baby."

-Andy: "You know, you should really let people see those paintings you've been working on in your room." Grayson: "Stop spying on me." Andy: "Stop being so talented."

-Laurie: "You know, I almost died once in an amusement park. I got strangled by an animatronic bear. Turns out when you throw a whole cup of soda on it, those things go crazy. It doesn't make a whole lot of sense, but they actually had to shoot it."

-Jules: "I will never stop worrying about you. When you're 80 and I'm telling everyone that I'm 90, and getting away with it by the way, I will still lay awake at night in the nursing home where we live together, waiting for you to get home."

-Jules: "Someone added a name to the guest list. T Gazelian? Who the hell is that?"

How I Met Your Mother: Karma

What Happened, Yo!:

-Barney is still hung up over Quinn, and while at the Lusty Leopard with Ted, he realizes that Quinn is a stripper named Karma at the club. Ted convinces Barney to pursue her even though she's a stripper (Though Barney convinces himself that it was his own idea). He talks to Quinn at the club who tells him she has a rule against dating customers and that her boss is giving her the stink-eye for talking to him instead of working. So Barney pays her to give him a lap dance while he tries to convince her to date him. After buying hundreds of dollars worth in lap dances (and giving her his rolex), Quinn agrees to a date, but since she has to work, she asks if it can be in the club. Barney agrees, and ignores Ted when Ted realizes that Quinn is scamming him. On their "date", Quinn gets more money from him and convinces him to use the expensive Champagne Room, but when Barney sees her pulling the same stuff she did with him last night on another guy, he realizes Ted was right and she's scamming him. Quinn says it's only business and Barney says after all he's done over the years he probably deserves it, but he also says he's been trying to be a better person and she just proved to him he had it right before. He leaves, but the next day he accidentally runs into Quinn again at the coffee shop the next day. They talk a bit, and Barney realizes she's been remembering all the things he's said to her, though she just downplays that. She buys him a coffee and he accepts her offer to sit down and have coffee with her.

-Meanwhile Robin is staying with Lily and Marshall for a few days in East Meadow, and they're excited to have her. She's bored by the suburban life they seem to enjoy, but soon finds that Lily and Marshall apparently don't want her to leave. After a failed escape attempt, Marshall and Lily admit that they also hate the suburbs, but they think it's the best place for their child so they won't move back to Manhattan. Robin feels for them, but she won't stay with them.
-Meanwhile, Ted is still hurting after his recent episode with Robin and is unsure what to do with her old room. He tries to fill it with a series of hobbies, including meat smoking, woodworking, and pottery, but not only is he bad at it, but he keeps getting mocked by a vision of Robin who tells him he won't be able to fill the void she left. Eventually he talks with the real Robin about how hard it can be to move on. When she tells him about Marshall and Lily, he invites them to the city to hang out, but when they get there, the apartment is empty, except for a note from Ted who tells them he's realized he's been haunting the apartment and that he is moving out so he can finally move on, and giving it to them (He never took his name off the lease). He's also turned Robin's old room into a nursery, with a crib in it that subsequently falls apart because Ted's not good at building things.

I Like This: Karma was a nice way to follow up last week's monumental episode with an episode that once again pushed the plot forward. I was a big fan of Quinn's first appearance two weeks ago and thought her being a stripper was a great idea. This week confirms my thoughts as we watched Karma give Barney a taste of his own medicine. I totally bought that Barney could fall for Quinn's tricks, since being vulnerable is kind of a new thing for him and because Neil Patrick Harris sold it well. I also liked the conclusion with them running into each other once again, showing that maybe it is destiny that these two keep crossing paths. Meanwhile, Ted had a small story this week, but it was funny (his lack of skill at both woodworking and carpentry led to a lot of great gags) and emotionally effective, and while this episode set up that Marshall and Lily wanted to move back to the city, I wasn't expecting it to get resolved this episode, and I definitely wasn't expecting Ted to move out of the apartment. Marshall and Lily being the sole owners of the apartment is a great development and I can't wait to see where we go from here, with Ted out on his own moreso now than ever.

But...: Robin's adventures in the suburbs were necessary for the last scene, but they were pretty flat and unentertaining, though the diary lines got pretty funny.

The Bottom Line: Karma is another great episode of How I Met Your Mother, with another big plot development that's once again left me excited for the next episode.

Grade: 82% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Ted: "In a city of 8 million people, you happen to walk into the club where she works? Maybe it’s destiny". Barney: "Nah, Destiny strips at the Melon Patch. They’re people, Ted. Try to keep 'em straight."
-Barney: "Damn it, Ted. Why can't you ever root for love?"

-Robin: "Also, Diary, I think writing in you is stupid but you were a gift from Lily and she’s watching me right now."

-Ted: "I can’t believe we’re in a strip club and the biggest boob in here is you." Barney: "It's a real date, Ted. And clearly you haven't seen the Dasalvo twins. She's right over there." Ted: "Barney,- Yowza!"

-Quinn: "Hey gorgeous, wanna dance?" Barney: "Is it a jig? Because if so, it's up! Sorry, I only had the last verse of Hot For Teacher to work on that."

-Barney: "You're playing me, again! And you're not even trying hard. There's no manager there. You're pointing at a fern!"

-Quinn: "You can't pretend to be some hurt little victim with me. I know you." Barney: "Well, of course you do. I told you things I don't tell anybody. I was honest with you." Quinn: "Yeah, because I believe you have a gay black brother, a friend lonely enough to smoke his own meat and that your mother was a groupie for Supertramp." Barney: "They named their band for her!"

Parks and Recreation: Sweet Sixteen

What Happened, Yo!:

-Ron wants Leslie to take time off from the parks department, because although City Council is only a part time job (showing she could still stay with the department if she wins), running a campaign is a full-time job and with Leslie working 100 hours a week (50 at the Parks Department and 50 at her campaign) plus her volunteering at Wheels For Meals On Wheels (They fix Meals on Wheels vans) stuff is starting to fall through the cracks. Leslie insists she's fine though and won't take any time off. When she finds out she forgot Jerry's birthday (Who is born on February 29th and only gets one real birthday every 4 years), Leslie plans a surprise party for him at Donna's family lake house. But she forgets to invite Jerry so she and Ron set out to retrieve him.

-On the way to the party (With Jerry), she finds out that her latest campaign signs have been screwed up, because the sign guy printed the URL to the design she sent him as a sign instead of printing the design. By the time she corrects the problem and gets Jerry to the lake house, everyone has gone to sleep or is out looking for Champion (more on that in a sec). She throws a bit of a party of Jerry and then falls asleep on him, forcing Jerry to stay in the same spot all night. Later Ron tells her about the time he tries to work two jobs and finish middle school, and says it's better to full-ass one thing than half-ass two and Leslie decides to cut back her hours at the Parks Department to 10 hours a week.

-Meanwhile Tom is upset when he finds out Ann doesn't know who Ginuwine (Who is apparently Donna's cousin) is because a lack of knowledge of 90's R&B Stars is on his list of no-no's for women he dates. He confides to a reluctant April (who has found herself the confidante in their relationship since she fixed them up) that he might break up with Ann over this. Ann gets upset when she hears this. April gets really drunk in order to stand helping Ann and Tom and in her drunken state, she breaks the two of them up for fighting over stupid reasons. This causes Ann and Tom to make up and give this thing another try, much to April's disdain.

-Meanwhile Chris has spent the last few days watching Champion while Andy and April were out of town and has grown attached to the dog. He gives Andy things he's bought Champion and gives Andy plenty of advice. At the lake house, Andy begins tiring of Chris' advice and lets Champion off the leash, where he runs into the woods. They go looking for him and Andy admits to Chris that Chris is much better with the dog than he is so maybe Chris should have Champion. Chris refuses, saying that Champion belongs to Andy and that he'll probably come if he hears Andy singing. Andy tries it and Champion comes running, but we see that it's because Chris had a dog whistle which Andy was unaware of. Chris seems fine, but at the party we can see that he's bothered that others have something special in their lives and he's alone.

I Like This: Sweet Sixteen was a good episode that showed us that even Leslie's rampant workaholic tendencies have limits and handled it well, having her realizing that maybe she shouldn't work over 100 hours a week.. I enjoyed how it interfered with Jerry's party (Of course he's born on February 29th. That just makes sense.) and that whole story was fun. I also liked how the story used Leslie and Ron's relationship. His speech to her at the end explaining why he feels she should take time off was very nice and also funny, staying consistent with Ron's history. I also liked Andy and Chris' storyline, which once again humanized Chris greatly and made me feel bad for the guy. Hopefully things pick up for him soon. The scene where he assured Andy that Champion was his and made it look like Andy found the dog was again, funny and sweet. And of course, super drunk April is always funny.

But...: I didn't care that much for Tom and Ann's story this week. There were funny moments (Particularly when April got involved), but it didn't live up to the potential of the two of them dating. Hopefully this'll change though, because I'm still looking forward to a Tom/Ann relationship if it's played right.

The Bottom Line: Sweet Sixteen was a solid episode of Parks and Rec, getting Leslie to work less and giving us plenty of good Jerry moments. I just hope Tom and Ann's couple stories are better handled in the future.

Grade: 82%

Memorable Moments

-Leslie: "Oh Ann, you beautiful rule-breaking moth."

-Leslie starts to plan Jerry's party. April:  "The usual. Cake and pop?" Leslie: "No, April. The unusual." April: "Fish and pop?" Leslie: "No." April: "Cake and fish?" Leslie: "No! No fish."

-I enjoyed that Ann's hat said Tommy's Girl, and Tom's hat just said Tom, because no one owns him.

-April: "I was getting kind of sick of listening to Tom and Ann talk about their relationship, but then I remembered that alcohol existed. Thank you, alcohol."

-Jerry: "We didn't get to the drugstore for my liver medication." Leslie: "Well you should've thought of that before we dragged you out of the bath, Jerry!"

-Ron says something nice about Jerry for his birthday: "Jerry’s work is often adequate".

-Ron: "Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing."

The Office: After Hours

What Happened, Yo!:

-Nellie invites everyone out to drinks at the hotel after a productive week working on the store. She still hasn't picked a VP yet, but Todd is confident he'll get the job, because he's planning on sleeping with her. Dwight decides that he is going to try and sleep with Nellie to get the job. As the night goes on, Dwight and Packer are both persistant in their flirtations with Nellie, when Jim calls Dwight to handle a "Bed Bug" issue (more on this in a second.). Dwight asks Gabe to ensure that Packer doesn't sleep with Nellie, so Gabe sprays Packer's drink with something when Packer isn't looking, causing him to throw up (On Gabe, which wasn't planned.). Dwight seems to have won and Nellie wants to meet in his room, but Dwight has second thoughts, ultimately sabotaging the room key he gives Nellie because he would rather get the job the honorable way.

-Meanwhile, Jim has been spending lots of time with Kathy, because she's normal and not as wild as Stanley. But when she follows him back to his room to watch a basketball game with him and sits comfortably on his bed, Jim gets uncomfortable and tries to get her to leave/get someone else in the room. He calls Dwight to handle some "Bed Bugs" and Dwight's methods cause Kathy to need a shower, but she takes it in Jim's bathroom. Jim calls her on what she's doing, but she claims she isn't trying anything, calming Jim down before acting more suggestive than other. When she's actually under the covers in his bed, Jim calls Dwight again who chases her out of the room spraying for bed bugs. Kathy is gone, but Jim's room becomes uninhabitable and Jim has to room with Dwight for the night, as Nellie tries to break into the room.

-Back at the office, everyone has to work late, and Andy gets some Jamaican food brought in from Brandon, Val's boyfriend. Brandon almost immediately calls Daryl out because he thinks Daryl and Val are sleeping together. Daryl and Val insist he's overreacting, so Brandon gets Daryl to read his recent messages to Val. When one says "You're a great friend....." with five dots, the office (mainly Kelly) points out that five dots means Daryl is definitely hiding something. Andy and Pam talk to Daryl, and Pam advises him to make a move. Val apologizes for Brandon's behaviour and dismisses it as crazy, but Daryl says that he doesn't think the two of them being together is crazy and adds five dots.

-Meanwhile in Florida, Erin wants waffles but they don't have them currently. She tells Ryan she's planning on moving to Florida and Ryan sees this as a sign that she wants him to make a move. They sneak into the kitchen to make waffles, but have to hide. Ryan's interest in Erin dies when she suggests that something could happen in six months.


I Liked This: After Hours wasn't the strongest episode of The Office, but there was still plenty to like about it. Dwight continues to be an all-star in this storyline, flirting with Nellie one minute, and trying to smoke out bed bugs the next, with funny results. I also liked how he ultimately doesn't go through with sleeping with Nellie to get the job, preferring to do things the honorable way. Plus, if he had slept with Nellie, we wouldn't get to see Jim and Dwight eating ice cream in Dwight's room, which I found quite funny. Meanwhile, Kathy's attempts to make a move on Jim finally became more overt (Though not explicit) and I liked the way it was handled with Jim catching on immediately and not even considering making a move. As for back at the office, the story about staying late turned into a story about Val's boyfriend thinking Daryl slept with Val and became much more interesting because of it. Daryl and Val have kind of been in the background for much of the season and I'm glad to see them finally get momentum. The last scene with Daryl saying that he didn't think he and Val together would be crazy and ending with the quintuple dots was great. As was the scene where Andy insisted that he knew what advice Jim would give better than Pam would.

But...: Ryan and Erin's story was a total filler storyline, being funny but ultimately forgettable. Also, Dwight's story was also a bit thin and not as funny as his stories the past couple weeks (Still funny. Just not as funny). And Catherine Tate still needs more depth to her character. Hopefully that part is coming quickly.

The Bottom Line: After Hours will probably wind up being the weakest of the Tallahassee storyline when all is said and done (depending on how these last couple episodes go), but it was still really funny and I was happy to see some big steps in the Daryl/Val story.

Grade: 78% (Good)

Memorable Moments

-I enjoyed the cold open, with Pam, Angela, and Oscar taking turns to complain about each other, only for them all to complain when Andy says nothing is harder than owning a boat.

-Who would win in a fight between James Bond and Jason Bourne? Doesn't matter, according to Dwight: "Genghis Kahn could take them both down, because he's not afraid to kill children."

-Dwight: "Freak, I need a favour." Gabe: "Well then, you have to call me by my name: Gabriel Susan Lewis." I'm liking Gabe more and more this season.

-Kelly: "Three dots means 'to be continued', four dots is a typo, but five dots means: 'whoa. Do not make me say what I want to say baby, but if I did it would blow your mind'. Dot dot dot dot dot."

-Dwight: "A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present."

-Dwight: Win it all costs, don’t respect women. These are the tenants that I was brought up with and they have served me well. But my ancestors never worked in corporate America. They were farmers, and before that hunters, and before that time travelers, and before that me again... At least that’s how the legend goes. The point is they never had to worry about how they got ahead. They just had to put food on the table and not alter the past".

5 Things I Enjoyed About Survivor: One World: Tribal Dysfunction

Oh, Kat. Salani probably made the wrong decision last night when they chose to keep Kat around instead of Nina. In fact, unless Kat makes a massive turn-around over the next couple episodes, they definitely made the wrong decision. But Kat amuses me, even if she's a liability to her tribe and I find the dysfunction of the Salani Tribe fascinating, so I'm glad she's sticking around for now. And after an episode that made up for the bum note the season premiere ended on, here's this weeks 5 Things I Liked About Survivor: One World

1. Interview Interrupted: As the girls return from their first Tribal Council, they are informed by Mike (At least, I think it was Mike) that he's been making sure their fire didn't go out. Well Kat takes offense about this for some reason, and while she's in the process of explaining (Though I still didn't understand her point), an insect buzzes into frame and she gets distracted. I like it when the confessionals don't go as planned and that amusing moment helped get the episode off on a good start.

2. Do It Yourself: This episode marked the introduction of The Do It Yourself Challenge, where Probst is absent and the contestants have to run their own reward challenge (Because with no Redemption Island, they can do Reward Challenges again.). So Bill does his best Jeff Probst impression and the tribes set out to untangle a giant knot mess and win a tarp. It's fun to watch, though I did miss Jeff's play-by-play, and in the end the boys win again.

3. Survivor: Colton's World: Colton kind of got on my nerves this week. He kept complaining about being an outcast, but he didn't seem to be making any effort to be part of his tribe, preferring to spend every second with the girls. Sabrina (Still one of my favorites) calling a fake meeting so he would leave was another great moment of the episode for me, but Colton gets the 5 Things spot for deciding to reveal his idol to Leif, Jonas, Tarzan, and Troyzan, creating a makeshift alliance of mismatched misfits, simply because he doesn't have any other choice for now. Boy, this should be fun to watch.

4. Kat: An Embarrassment to Womankind?: The Immunity Challenge brought more funny Kat moments, but was really painful to watch as Kat struggled and struggled and struggled through the challenge, finding it hard to get around some of the girl's big boobs, and jumping into the water for no reason... twice. Nina got angrier and angrier with her as the challenge progressed and for good reason. The girls eventually started to figure it out, but it was too little, too late, as the boys won yet again. Oh, how I love this dysfunction.

5. Stick With The Status Quo: Tribal Council had Jeff being brutal with the girls. He told them they were off to one of the worst starts he had ever seen and compared them to sixth graders. And as the whole Nina vs. Kat struggle quickly emerged, I started to wonder if Kat's alliance would turn on her. Chelsea and Sabrinna admitted if they could start over, they would rethink their alliances. Even Kat admitted she was responsible for losing the challenge and admitted it would be fair to vote her out (She also revealed she had never failed, because she never put herself in a position to fail, which really doesn't help her case). It was all good, but in the end the status quo won out and Nina was sent home. It's a shame. But maybe the girls will be better role models for people watching at home next week.

That's all for this time out.

Cougar Town: A Mind With A Heart Of Its Own

What Happened, Yo!:

-Now that Jules and Grayson are engaged, Jules begins planning the wedding. She asks Ellie to be her <aid of Honor and Ellie accepts, on the condition that Jule not be a people pleaser when it comes to her wedding and be selfish. Jules goes to tell Laurie that she's a bridesmaid, but Laurie (who assumes Jules is asking Laurie to be Maid of Honor) tells her that Ellie should be the Maid of Honor and asks if Jules could make them both Co-Maids of Honor. Jules accepts and tries to pass it off to Ellie as her idea. She fakes asking Laurie again without telling Laurie what's up, but Ellie catches on when Lauries makes the two of them Co-Moh (It's an abbreviation) shirts less than an hour after allegedly accepting the offer. Laurie gets mad and says she's out as Maid of Honor but Jules tells her to just accept it and start writing the toast (the only thing Ellie has to do).

-Meanwhile Bobby has made a zip-line to connect Jules and Grayson's houses as his wedding gift and as a metaphor that he's cool with them getting married. Andy doesn't think it's a good idea, but feels bad when Jules also doesn't like it. But Jules (who was on the roof when she told Ellie she couldn't quit being Co-Maid of Honor) winds up using it when Ellie starts to cross the street to tell Laurie the truth. Jules injures herself, causing Bobby to take it down) but she appreciates the gesture.

-An injured Jules tells Ellie she's mad because Ellie is acting like she's flawless, but she points out Ellie can be mean. She also points out that she likes being a people pleaser and that Ellie doesn't mind when she's the one Jules is pleasing. Ellie apologizes, but Jules is still mad so they stage Ellie's fake murder to bury the hatchet.

-Meanwhile, Travis is visiting his grandfather and Jules makes Grayson go so he can ask permission to marry Jules. He asks, but Chick isn't ready to give him permission yet. He tells Grayson that Grayson seems to care about Jules like he cares about his horse before trying to make Grayson shoot the horse to prove his love. Grayson won't do it, and also doesn't know that Chick's horse is fine and he's being tricked. Chick later tells Travis he's torturing Grayson because he failed Jules by letting her marry Bobby and he doesn't want to do that again. Travis tells him Grayson is a good guy and Chick agrees, but they then have to stop Grayson who they see going back to shoot the horse.


I Liked This:

A Mind With A Heart of Its Own was another funny episode of Cougar Town, once again being quite funny (The Two-Man Sad Zip-Line) with some good running gags (Jules not knowing anything about movies and the fake murders come to mind, as does "Thanks, babe".) and also having plenty of heart (The reason Chick's been messing with Grayson.). The main plot with Jules letting Laurie being Co-Maid of Honor and trying to deceive Ellie about it was a good one and I enjoyed how it tied in with the whole zip-line thing (Jules falling onto the car was great). Meanwhile, Ken Jenkins returned as Jules father and the results were quite funny indeed. I was a big fan of Ken Jenkins on Scrubs and I enjoy him on Cougar Town too, so I enjoyed him messing with Grayson. Who doesn't enjoy a storyline where a man is being forced to shoot a horse as a test to show he'd do anything for his fiance? And I enjoyed the sentiment at the end of the story too. Bobby is a good person, but he was a bad husband, so it's natural that Chick would be apprehensive about Grayson at first.

But...: Ir's too bad we didn't get more stuff with the zip-line. Zip-lines are awesome.


The Bottom Line: A Mind With A Heart Of Its Own was a solid episode of Cougar Town with plenty of laughs and plenty of Ken Jenkins.

Grade: 82% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Titles We Liked Better Than Cougar Town: Sunshine State, The Drinking Age, Cougar City, Mid-Life

-Laurie: "Ohh. You're getting married. It's so romantic, like that movie Inception when Leo loved his wife SO much, but then she gets mad and moves to that weird city where there's like, no people and earthquakes all the time. Then he ends up on Snow Mountain and falls in love with Juno". Ellie: "Aw, Jellybean. You didn't understand that movie at all, didja?" Laurie: "No, but I cried so hard at the end."

-Laurie: "I got those guys THE best engagement gift. It's a giant portrait of them, but it's made entirely out of chocolate. You know, they're way better as a black couple." Bobby: "Most people are." Laurie: "Truth.

-Bobby: "What's a better way of telling them I'm cool with everything?" Andy: "How bout' just tell them?" Bobby: "Well, that's dumb."

-Laurie: "Jules is skittish about stuff you build. Ever since you tried to kill her with those 'tub speakers'". Bobby: "Well, I said she could take bath OR listen to music."

-Jules: "As my Co-Maid of Honor-" Laurie: "Oh, just say Co-moh. It's a new abreev I came up with. Total T-Saver."

-Bobby: "Just come on up here so I can push you off the roof." Jules: "No! Wait, that's just not big enough. Noooo!"

-Travis: "Grayson, you're acting like you've never shot a horse before!" Grayson: "I haven't!" Travis: "That's kind of weird. you're a full grown man."

-Jules: "I mean, why do they even make thongs for kids?" Ellie: "That wouldn't have been a thong on a six-year-old." Jules: "Mean."

-Ellie: "I said people-pleasing annoys me. Not Ellie-pleasing. I love that."

-

Glee: On My Way

Son of a bitch, Glee! Son of a bitch! OK, full disclosure: I inadvertantly had the big cliffhanger ending of last night's Glee spoiled to me right before I watched it. So I wasn't caught off guard when it happened, which was a bit of a bummer (Though, even if I hadn't known, I would've caught on before it happened. I always keep my eyes out for the warning signs of a car crash in TV/movies.). However, even knowing what was going to happen, Quinn getting in a bad car crash was still an effective ending (And I still yelled at my television) as Glee goes on hiatus for seven weeks. But of course, that ending wasn't the only thing that happened so let's touch on...

What Happened, Yo!

-It's the week before Regionals and Sebastian schemes to get Rachel out of the picture by blackmailing her with a fake nude photo of Finn in high heels. Rachel won't give in to his demands, which upsets Finn.

-Karofsky is outed and humiliated at his school. After seeing a series of hateful facebook messages, he attempts suicide and hangs himself. He doesn't die, but the news of his suicide attempt greatly affects all of our characters, causing Kurt to feel guilty because he ignored Karofsky's calls, Will to recount the time he almost killed himself, Sebastian (who knew Karofsky from the gay bar and wasn't particularly helpful to him) to call off the attack on New Directions (and use the Warblers performance to raise money for Lady GaGa's charity), and Rachel and Finn to decide they want to get married after regionals.

-Regionals happen and New Directions win (I know. Big surprise.).

-Sue is pregnant but won't reveal the identity of the father. She sees Regionals and decides she actually wants to help New Directions win Nationals, much to Will's surprise.

-After Regionals, Kurt visits Karofsky, where he helps him to see that his problems won't last forever and helps him envision a happy future. They become friends, finally giving their running storyline the closure I always wanted.

-Quinn wants to get back on the Cheerios but Sue doesn't think it'd be fair to all the others who've practiced all year. Quinn thinks the God Squad should pray for Karofsky's family rather than Karofsky because Karofsky acted selfishly, upsetting Kurt who tells her that even with all her troubles, she has no idea what it's like. Quinn gets back on the Cheerios after all, because Sue admires the way she turned her life around. Quinn decides that she wants to go to Rachel's wedding and after regionals, she runs home to get her dress.

-Rachel's Dad's and Burt are opposed to the wedding (Carole, not so much) and try to figure out how to stop it from happening. Everyone (but Quinn) is present and the wedding looks like it'll happen. Rachel doesn't want to start without Quinn and texts her frantic messages.

-Quinn is driving and decides to respond to the messages. As she texts On My Way (Hey! That's the title of the episode. That couldn't possibly be a bad sign), she is sideswiped by a car and the screen goes black. To be continued in seven weeks.

-Son of a bitch, Glee!

I Like This:

We'll talk more about that ending (and how my knowing of the twist affected my viewing of the episode) in a second, but first let's talk about Karofsky. Since at this stage in the game, every competition until National's is robbed of it's suspense because there was no way they'd have them lose at Regional's, the show needed a story to make up for an unsuspenseful Regionals and Karofsky trying to kill himself definitely made up for knowing who was going to win. I wasn't spoiled on this in advance, but the moment we started cutting between Karofsky going through the worst day of his life and Blaine singing Cough Syrup, which repeats the phrase Life's Too Short multiple times, I knew where this was headed (as did everyone watching, I assume). The scene is beautifully put together and is one of the most emotionally powerful things Glee has ever done. It punched me in the gut with feelings and then did it again when they showed Karofsky's dad finding his unconscious body. I stated last fall (at least I think I did) that I had always felt miffed on how Karofsky and Kurt's storyline had just sort of ended last year without a real conclusion and that Karofsky's tearful apology in Prom Queen felt incredibly unearned. Well, I finally got the conclusion I wanted (Though I'm gonna assume we see Karofsky at least one more time after this) and it was beautiful. The scene at the end with Kurt and Karofsky at the hospital was lovely.

I also liked how the show was pretty grounded and realistic in both the suicide attempt, and everyone's reactions to it. When something like this happens, you can't just carry on like nothing's happened and I liked how the suicide attempt was the catalyst for much of what happened next. As for other things I liked, I liked how Rachel and Finn rushing the wedding made sense (and how the show still recognizes that this isn't a good idea). I'm also glad that Sue has finally stopped targeting Glee (like she was supposed to after season 2 ended) and is now helping them. I'm also excited to see how her pregnancy is handled.

Now let's talk about the ending. All throughout the episode, we are being reminded of how Quinn has turned her life around and how she has her whole life ahead of her. She rejoins the Cheerios and decides to support Rachel and Quinn. She also has a confrontation with Kurt, which as far as we know, was never resolved, which will give Kurt something to feel guilty about in seven weeks. Really, it's obvious that something bad is going to happen to her once you already know that something bad happens, but I still like how it was handled. The show has taken a lot of time to make us care about Quinn turning her life around and it should be interesting to see if the show actually kills her off or not.

But...: All the Regional's stuff felt like they were just getting it out of the way, rather than actuall getting us to invest on whether or not they'll win Regionals and even though I knew they would win Regionals, I still felt a little miffed (That's my word of the day). And Will's personal story felt out of place and superfluous to the scene where he gets the kids to promise they'll never try to kill themselves.

The Bottom Line: On My Way was a powerful episode that sort of ignored Regionals, but has left me excited for the return of the show in seven weeks.

Grade: 80% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Best Musical Number: Cough Syrup. Beautifully performed, beautifully staged.

-Worst Musical Number: Glad You Came, the second Dalton number, because it felt like filler. If you don't have a major character on the other team (Sebastian's not a regular yet) or if you can't make an emotional connection with something going on with the episode, you don't need to give the rival team 2 numbers.

-Theory Time: Here's my prediction for how the cliffhanger will be resolved when we get back. Quinn doesn't die (at least not immediately) but becomes comatose for an episode or two, allowing Rachel's (and possibly Kurt if the two never resolved their argument this week) guilt space to play out. Should Quinn awake, we won't see her back at school for another couple episodes so she has time to recover. Should she die... I have no idea what might happen. So that's my theory.

How I Met Your Mother: No Pressure

All throughout my time watching HIMYM, I always wondered how Robin fit into things. After all, since the first two seasons were about Ted being in love with Robin, she has to play some important role in the titular mystery for the story to start there, right? When Barney was revealed as the groom at the wedding in which Ted met the mother, I began assuming that Robin would be the bride. That, in my mind, would justify the two seasons (Though those were great seasons) where she was the focus of Ted's romantic life. And while that still could happen (and is still what I'm hoping for), No Pressure justifies those two seasons by revealing that Ted still loves Robin on some level and will never be able to settle down, as long as the possibility exists that they could get together one day. Great stuff, but before we talk about it further, let's talk about:

What Happened, Yo!:

-Future Ted tells his kids about the first time he told the mother he loved her, and mentions the last time he told a woman he loved her, it was Robin. We then go back to the cliffhanger from last week. After telling Robin he loves her and reminding her it's been five years since they broke up (after asking themselves where they saw each other in five years and having extremely different answers), Ted suggests that they should try again, but quickly brushes it off and leaves before she can reply. Ted decides to take back what he said when Robin kisses him. They decide to figure out what they should do now, but have no time because Robin has to go to Russia for a week.

-Ted tells Marshall and Lily what's going on and Lily seems to be against Ted getting back together with Robin. At the same time Barney (Who spent the night at Marshall and Lily's after the last episode and who was rummaging around looking for a sex tape) discovers Marshall and Lily have several ongoing bets, including Lily betting that Ted and Robin wouldn't end up together. Lily tries to sabotage Ted until Ted finds out what's going on. Lily points out that Ted hasn't settled down with Robin during the five years since they've been together and that there must be a reason. Ted concludes that Robin loves Barney, but when he tells Barney, Barney tells him everything that happened between him and Robin last fall and says he's over Robin. He also tells Ted he won't mind if Ted and Robin date.

-Meanwhile, Barney learns one of the bets is that Barney will never watch Lily and Marshall's sex tape, so he tracks it down and prepares to watch on Ted's VCR. Marshall tries to discourage Barney from watching it, but Lily tries to encourage him, and Barney gets so confused, he breaks the VCR and doesn't watch the tape.

-Robin returns and Ted takes her to dinner at the restaurant with the blue horn, but they realize that they're not going to get back together. Ted dissolves the agreement that they'll get married if they're both single at 40 because he can't move on if there is still a chance. Ted says he's fine, but Marshall tells Robin that Ted is probably hurting and that she has to move out. Robin agrees and moves out. Marshall still won't concede to Lily that Ted and Robin won't end up together. Future Ted tells his kids that in a way he was happy because a world of possibility has opened up to him. We then see Ted walk alone in a stream of yellow umbrellas.

I Liked This: Wow. No Pressure was probably my favorite episode of season 7 so far, being as emotionally effective as Symphony of Illumination, but also really funny. Marshall and Lily having made long-term bets on their friends is one of those funny ideas, that also fits with what we know about those characters. The flashback to Lily trying to collect on the bet that Ted and Robin don't end up together during the various stages of Ted's engagement to Stella was one of the best jokes of the episode. In fact, I appreciated all the nods and references to previous episodes, from Ted finally finding out about Barney and Robin's fall hook-up to the return of the blue horn (which now is chained up in another one of the episode's best jokes). It helped reinforce that this is an important episode for the show going forward, and the ending with Robin moving out and Ted walking into a sea of possibility (represented by a stream of people with yellow umbrellas) was top notch. It should be interesting to see how this new development affects the show going forward. Finally, I also liked the revelation of the Marshall/Lily sex tape and how their desire to win the bet about whether or not Barney watches it led to the destruction of Ted's VCR (I also own a VCR by the way.). Funny stuff. Funny stuff. However, something tells me we haven't seen the last of that sex tape.

But...: Marshall still not conceding the bet better not be the show hinting that they'll try something like this again down the road.

The Bottom Line: No Pressure was a fantastic episode of How I Met Your Mother, which finally closes the book on Ted and Robin in an effective way, while still managing to be very funny.

Grade: 95% (Almost Perfect)

Memorable Moments

-The movie playing at the theatre where Ted tells the mother he loves her is The Wedding Bride III.

-Ted: "I go camping in secret!"

-Lily tries to get Ted to make a big romantic gesture for Robin (She wants to scare her off) so Ted comes up with ideas. "So I just walk up to her in Red Square with a dozen roses. Or float down to her in my hot air balloon with TEN dozen roses."

-Bets made include Barney Dies By Murder, Robin Will Never Return Lily's Hairdryer, Ted Will Go Bald, and If Ted Goes Bald, He'll Totally Pull It Off.

-Just when I had forgotten that Conan O'Brien was supposed to show up as an extra at some point, he showed up last night and even though he didn't say or do anything besides turn his head, I found his cameo funny.

-Ted: "Barney, you've really grown up, you know that?" Barney: "Thanks, now lets watch our two best friends have sex on tape!"

-Lily and Marshall try to convince Barney to watch/not watch the sex tape. Lily: "I slap my own ass." Marshall: "I slap MY own ass!"

-Ted: "Barney, that was my VCR." Barney: "Ted, it was a VCR."

Parks and Recreation: Dave Returns

What Happened, Yo!:

-Leslie and Ben (Despite his massive fear of cops) are hoping to get the endorsement of the retiring police chief, and though he likes her, he's not sure about endorsing her because the Newports give lots of money to the department for things like Kevlar vests. He tells them if they go to his retirement party, they might have a better chance. As they leave, they run into Leslie's old flame Dave, who is back from San Diego for a day to attend the chief's retirement party. Leslie invites him to dinner with her and Ben, because Dave is a good judge of character, and if he likes Ben, the other cops will like Ben.

-At the dinner though, Ben steps away for a minute and Dave tells Leslie he's still in love with her and wants to get back together. Leslie says no, and when Dave steps away later, she tells Ben. Dave wants to talk to Leslie again, but Ben wants to talk to Dave and when they do talk, Ben won't let Dave try to win back Leslie, so Dave handcuffs him to a urinal. Ben lets Leslie know with his cellphone what happened and Dave has to uncuff Ben. At the retirement party, Leslie and Dave have a talk, where Dave admits he went a bit crazy without Leslie and they end on good terms. And Ben is able to persuade the police chief that he should endorse Leslie.

-Meanwhile, Andy is in charge of writing Leslie's campaign song and he gets the rest of the team to be back-up. They go to the same recording studio where Ron records his stuff as Duke Silver, so Ron tasks April with getting rid of any Duke Silver memorabilia she finds. Andy just can't get the song to work and he's frustrated because he sees it as the only thing he can do to help the campaign. Ron tells him not to overthink it and secretly records a Saxophone solo, which makes the song much better in Andy's eyes.

-Also meanwhile, Tom is excited after his date with Ann, but Ann tells him not to make a big deal out of it and not to tell anyone. At the recording, Ann gets upset when she finds out that Tom texted everybody while they were on the date. Tom tries to make it better with grand gestures, but Ann just gets more mad at him. Eventually he gets her to have a "no gimmicks" talk with him, but he just sings that he wants her to be his beau until she agrees because he finally wore her down.

I Like This: In some ways, Dave Returns was an awesome blast from the past to season 2 of Parks, specifically the episode Practice Date, where the show had just found it's legs and was only beginning to show off what it was capable of. There was references to Duke Silver (It's been way too long), the term wiz palace (which may have been my favorite joke in Practice Date), and of course, Louie C.K was in it, as the delightfully (for the most part) awkward Dave. With Dave's still being in love with Leslie, and Ben's ongoing fear of cops (which never gets old), the dinner scene was full of awkward goodness, which I enjoyed. I also enjoyed how the whole encounter with Dave tied into Leslie's campaign, as they attempted to get the police chief's endorsement, and Ben powering through his fear long enough to provide a compotent argument for why Leslie is better for the department than Bobby was also good. Andy's storyline was good too, as he struggled with coming up with the perfect song, when all he needed was a sweet Sax solo from a mysterious source. I also enjoyed April being tasked with getting rid of all Duke Silver memorabillia, and I'm glad that the show is both trying a Tom and Ann relationship and not having Ann be open to it right away. There's a lot of history between these two characters and the show isn't ignoring that history so they can have the perfect romance, and that's just great.

But...: Dave was definitely more awkward than he had been in season 2, and while that was mostly fine, sometimes it felt like the show had amped up Dave's awkwardness a little much. He was much more down-to-earth in season 2, so it was a little jarring to see him be an awkward mess in every scene he was in (Though the show at least provided a plausible justification for his extreme behaviour.).

The Bottom Line: Dave Returns was another great episode that reminded me of how far the show has come.

Grade: 87% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Ben: "I’m not afraid of cops, I have no reason to be. I never break any laws, ever. Because I’m deathly afraid of cops."

-Andy: "It's like 'We Are The World,' except I think it could actually make a real impact on society."

-April: "I dig your groovy tunes, man. Did you hear me? I said I dig your groovy tunes, man".

-Dave: "You look like I could use some company."

-Tom: "I don’t wanna brag, but I have a ton of experience with women being mad at me".

-Dave: “I still have feelings for Leslie, in a womanly fashion, and I believe she feels the same for me, in a manly way.”

-Ron to Andy: “I never thought I would say this about you, son, but you may be over-thinking this.”

-Tom: "The four sweetest words in the English language: you wore me down"

The Office: Tallahassee

What Happened, Yo!:

-It's the first day of the Sabre Store project and Dwight is hoping to get noticed by the Special Projects President (And new series regular!) Nellie Bertam, who was one of the applicants for the manager's job in Scranton. Scranton arrives with other groups at an orientation where Jim and Dwight are surprised to see Todd Packer, who they had tricked into going to Florida last season because they thought he'd get fired. Nellie shows up and starts the orientation off. At the start of the day, Dwight had been feeling a pain, which was slowly getting worse. After finding out Jim didn't poison him (as Jim had joked about), Dwight prepares to go to the hospital, when he finds out that Nellie is looking for a Vice President. Dwight ignores his pain and tries to be more impressive than Packer, but it soon becomes obvious to everyone that something is wrong, and after Dwight collapses from trying to be the top of the human pyramid, he is carried off to the hospital to get his appendix removed. But Dwight escapes after his surgery and returns so he can give his group's presentation, despite being unprepared. Dwight fumbles his way through the presentation, but still manages to impress Nellie who invites him (and also Todd) to come in early to talk about the store over breakfast. Dwight also keeps his appendix as a souvenir for his son.

-Back at the office, it is peaceful until everyone realizes that Erin had set the phone to voicemail. Andy steps in as a temp receptionist and quickly takes a shine to the job. Pam and Daryl convince him that his interest in reception is fleeting. Later, as he explains to a client where Erin has gone, he looks at a photo of them (at Kevin's birthday) and tells the client he misses her.


I Like This: Tallahassee really kicks off the Dwight in Florida arc that was set up last week, and it continues to be probably the best thing thats happened in season 8.  The cold open was probably the hardest I've laughed at the show since we saw Creed as manager way back in Search Committee and got the episode off on a great start. I was a bit iffy when I heard Todd Packer would be returning, but I like him in the role of Dwight's rival and watching them vie for the position of Nellie's VP should be fun to watch in recent years. And, though I have some issues with the wackiness of it all (see below) Dwight escaping the hospital and giving a presentation he's completely unprepared for was quite funny, and I was oddly touched by him deciding his Appendix would be a good souvenir for his son. Rainn Wilson continues to be on fire, doing wonders in every scene he's in. And I'm not sure I've ever liked Stanley as much as I do right now and he was already one of my favorite characters. Lastly, Andy as Temp Receptionist was a slight story, but a funny one, and I hope him missing Erin will finally get those two crazy kids back together so we can stop hearing about them trying to get back together.

But...: The Office isn't the most realistic show on the planet, especially in these latter years, but although it was funny to watch, Dwight coming back to the presentation three hours after being taken away for appendicitis seemed like it was pushing the limits in terms of cartoonishness. And I'm fine with Catherine Tate as a series regular, but it would nice to see her character get a bit more personality, beyond "Wacky Boss".

The Bottom Line: Tallahassee was a great second entry in the Sabre Store storyline that continues to reaffirm my faith in the show, even with the over-the-top cartoonishness of Dwight powering through Appendicitus.

Grade: 82% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Dwight:"Work starts at 9. Sabre HQ is 30 minutes away driving at the speed limit. Giving everyone 20 minutes to shower, plus 50 for Jim to style his hair, 20 for breakfast, 40 for Erin to get lost between her room and the lobby, 90 for Ryan to do his morning ecstasy. We're already 20 minutes late."

-Dwight: "Why are you sleeping that way?" Erin (Who fell asleep with her head at the feet of the bed and her feet at the head): "I was reading the mattress tag and I fell asleep.

-Erin: "What do you think happened?" Dwight: "Looks like Jim got mixed up with some bad apples". Jim's prank had me laughing for a full minute. Also the note "Dwight did This- Luwanda at the alcohol club".

-Dwight: "First impressions get locked in forever. When I first met Pam, she said something that slightly rubbed me the wrong way. Since then I've loved working with Pam, and she's frankly wonderful, but I hate her."

-Florida Stanley continues to be a great comic invention. "Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my motto's."

-Creed: "It's so peaceful, I've already written, like, 12 plays today."

-Nellie: "Well, sorry to disappoint, but my big whooping penis is right here (points at brain) and I'm not afraid to use it. So stop looking at my breasts and start looking at my penis."

-Dwight: "You didn't poison me. It's just stress." Jim: "Ok." Dwight: "What is the antidote?" Jim: "True love's kiss."

-Poison Control: "Sir? Sir, where should we send the ambulance?" Dwight: "Send it to the freaking moon, idiot."

-Jim: "I've spent so much of my life telling myself 'please don't end up like Stanley'. And now I'm wondering if I even have what it takes."

-Jim: "The one thing Pam made sure I knew: Florida's pretty loose with the death penalty."

-Dwight: "Don't remember me like this. Remember me as the man who pulled down the screen."

-Erin: "Let's see. What else did you miss? Ryan switched his name tag to his pants so know it's like if you wear yours on your shirt, you're a total dip, but if you switch you're a copy cat. But I think I've figured out a solution." Cue Erin having a name tag on her shirt and her pants.

-Jim: "Dwight, will you go back to the hospital? You were there for like three hours." Dwight: "I got the surgery. What else is there to do?" Erin: "Do a hundred jumping jacks." Dwight: "No, I don't feel like it! You do a hundred jumping jacks!" Erin: "I don't feel like it either." Cut to Erin doing a hundred jumping jacks.

-Dwight: "You're too slow. You're too small. Seabiscuit is a stupid name. You guys sound just like the enemies of Seabiscuit."

-Dwight: "The menstrual cycle determines every choice a woman makes".

-Dwight: "Anderson's three pillars of retail. Crucial. So important. Next. (Next slide is conclusion) Are there any questions?"

-Nellie: "I once spent a passionate night with Hugh Grant's brother, John Grant. He's older than Hugh. Just a tiny bit uglier. How did I pull that off? Through sheer force of will."

-Daryl: "Andy, when I was 12 years old, we did a field trip. A lock-in at the zoo. I met this girl. She was soo perfect. I was in love with her. But when the sun came up, I knew it wasn't real. Because she was ugly."

-Nellie: "That's disgusting! That's barely healed." Dwight: "You're not paying me to heal. You're paying me to kick ass."

-Dwight: "I had two goals today. The first was to make myself a clear candidate for Vice President. I achieved that, no thanks to my Appendix. The second was to find a memorable souvenir for Phillip. For that, I do have to thank my Appendix."

-Erin: "Famous, hi. I'm sure you get new ideas for cookies all the time-" Famous Amos: "Is it oatmeal with no raisins?" Erin: "I'm sorry to have wasted your time."

5 Things I Enjoyed About Survivor: One World: Two Tribes, One Camp, No Rules

How anti-climatic. That was my first thought after finishing the mostly enjoyable premiere of Survivor: One World. Everything was going great until Kourtney had to be medically evacuated from the challenge and the boys chose to just take the victory (which makes tactical sense and causes lots of juicy drama, but real men would've seen that challenge through because they probably would've won anyways). Kourtney's broken wrist caused her to be thrown from the game by default, so the first real elimination has yet to occur. Luckily though, Probst was still able to kick up some drama between the girls so the episode didn't end on a totally sour note. I'm still psyched on this season and all the possibilities the boys versus girls on one beach thing entails. And I still came up with five things I liked about this episode.

1. Right Off The Bat, There's An Axe To Grind: It wound up being the opening shot in the ongoing war between girls and boys, but Mike stealing the girls unguarded supplies, including the important axe in the first challenge of the game was really funny, as it slowly dawned on the girls what had happened, followed by Mike's confession that he stole a bunch of the girl's stuff. Would he have done it if he knew they would be close to the girls all game? Based on the boys later actions, I'd say yes.

2. The Fire Fight: The girls withhold one of the chickens country girl Chelsea caught from the boys, so this leads to the boys not helping them with the fire. This leads to some failed attempts from the girls to steal fire. Alicia tries it when the boys are right there, but quickly fails. Later in the night, Christina and Monica actually sneak over to the boys camp and successfully steal an ember, but the fire doesn't last. It was still awesome though. There's also plenty of bartering going on and when Christina finally strikes a deal, Alicia doesn't like it because she thinks Christina is trying to get in with the boys. Oh, Survivor drama, how I missed you.

3. Sabrina Finds An Idol! Except It's Not Hers to Keep. Schemes Ensue: Sabrina finds one of the men's idols and has to pick a man to give it to. Since the obviously gay Colton has been the friendliest to the women and is the only guy without a big alliance of some kind (and one of the few guys there who isn't a macho manly man) she gives it to him, giving him the opportunity to take out Alpha Dog Matt (Who's an obvious villain). Was this the right decision? Only time will tell. And this led to another thing I enjoyed.

4. Colton Has Wit: Colton right off the bat is one of the most ridiculous people in the game (Though Tarzan and Troyzan seem pretty ridiculous with those nicknames alone) and he may come to bug me in future weeks, but this week he was funny. His funniest line? "We're gonna cut his throat faster than Taylor Swift can write a song about her next boyfriend." It's funny because I didn't see it coming.

5. Let's Stir Up Some Animosity And Then Send Everyone Back To Camp: Again, because the challenge was cut short, and because there was almost no chance of Kourtney coming back to play the game (which is a real shame because she seemed interesting in the brief snippets we saw her.) the episode felt anti-climatic, but Probst still asked the girls some tribal questions and it still caused some chaos. Christina trying to explain how they got fire, only to be interrupted by Alicia who called it a shady deal, only to be interrupted by Christina who said Alicia didn't know what she was talking about, only for Alicia to insist she knew everything that had happened, only for Kat to also start talking for some reason we never heard was great, chaotic fun and a nice way to sweeten the sour note of no vote.

My Favorites To Win (As of Episode 1): Sabrina, Chelsea, Jonas are my top 3 at the moment, and if I had to pick one, Sabrina. Most of the guys did not impress me this week. That could change though.

Cougar Town: Ain't Love Strange

When Cougar Town first came out, I'll admit it: I was one of those people who wouldn't watch it because of it's title. Even after learning that the show had changed and strayed away from it's initial premise, and even as I saw it get more and more critically acclaimed, and even as one of my favorite shows Community began promoting the show, I just couldn't bring myself to watch it out of some sort of apathy. But when Cougar Town was held back from the ABC midseason schedule days after Community was taken off NBC's schedule, I realized that maybe I had made a mistake. Cougar Town was in the same boat as Community, so I should at least give it a chance. And I'm glad I did, because I quickly grew attached to Cougar Town and found myself anxiously awaiting the show's return. So now it's back and as I prepare to kick off my opinion of the season 3 premiere, I want to promise right now that I will never judge a show I hear good things about based on it's title alone again. So with that out of the way, let's get started:

 What Happened, Yo!:


-After Jules yells at some skateboarders, Grayson tells her he knew she would do that because she's predictable. She gets mad at this and tries to prove she's unpredictable to no success. After the skateboarders apparently shark her car, she decides to get back at them by TPing what she understands to be their house late at night with Tom. Laurie also comes along, but when they hear police sirens, Laurie (who has an ankle monitor and two strikes) bolts and Tom tries to make a distraction, only to start yelling about being Tasered. Jules comes out in the open and starts to explain to the police officer what's been happening when it turns out the officer is Grayson, there are no police, and Tom and Laurie are both present and fine. Grayson reveals he sharked her car, because he knew what she would do and that the house she TPed is actually one of her listings. The rest of the gang shows up and Grayson proposes (after using Tom to figure out how Jules would want to be proposed to because Jules just wrote the whole thing off as Tom being creepy.). Jules accepts.

-Meanwhile Travis has moved into off-campus housing with 8 other guys in a 2-bedroom apartment. It also has a green screen, which is awesome. Bobby swings by and tries to encourage Travis to take Dog Travis in as a sort of house pet, while getting Dog Travis accustomed to the house. Travis is reluctant to take the dog in. Andy asks Bobby why he doesn't just ask Travis to take in Dog Travis and Bobby says he's worried Travis will say no because he might feel he doesn't owe Bobby anything because he was a bad dad for so long. Eventually he does ask Travis after a heart-to-heart (and after setting the green screen so it looks like this is happening outside in the rain) and Travis says yes.

-Also meanwhile, Stan has become a bit of a "Devil Child", and Ellie is worried  he will grow up a terror. She grows more concerned when Stan takes a shine to Laurie and they bond. Laurie tells Ellie that with two amazing parents (Something she didn't have) Stan will probably be fine, though he still may remain a complete terror.

I Like This: Cougar Town at it's best is a nice mix of wonderfully funny and wonderfully sweet and that was definitely shown off here. Grayson's proposal to Jules was a very nice moment and I'm glad to see that the show isn't interested in keeping these two apart. Also, as a fan of recurring player Tom, I was glad to see him be a pretty active part of this episode. Sleeping nude sounds like something he'd do. And his attempt at putting his arm around Laurie was a great moment of comedy after the slight sadness of watching Bobby's reaction to the proposal. I also liked Travis and Bobby's storyline a lot. The green screen is awesome and provided plenty of laughs and I hope it becomes a recurring comedic element in the fashion of Big Carl or Penny Can. Travis' new living situation also should make for some good stories down the road. And Laurie bonding with Stan was pretty funny too, and the scene of her reassuring Ellie (while still pointing out that Stan could turn out wrong) was a nice scene, which shows us how far these two characters have come since their initial animosity (which is still there, sort of).

But...: No notable or easy to identify flaws this week.

The Bottom Line: Ain't Love Strange is a great start to Cougar Town's third season and I'm excited to actually watch the show as it airs this time around.

Grade: 86% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-I quite enjoy the title card gags. "Yeah, it's still called Cougar Town. We're not happy about it either."

-I really hope the wine necklaces come back. It's a great visual gag.

-Grayson's slightly extended version of Jules morning routine song was funny and helped illustrate one of the episode's points.

-Jules: "When it comes to love I'm a street rapping poet, yo".


-Laurie: "Of course, some devil-babies are just devil-babies.”

-Jules: “Don’t leave me! Prison’s great. You can get those neat teardrop tattoos.”

-Grayson: "I thought you wanted to do all the talking". Jules: "I'm speechless". Grayson: Really? You?"

Read more: http://www.tvfanatic.com/quotes/shows/cougar-town/#ixzz1mVmeFIKl

-Housemate of Travis: "Dude, how often is your mom gonna come over?" Travis: "Probably more often than I'd like"

How I Met Your Mother: The Drunk Train

"I love you, Robin". In episode 3 of the season, we learned that this thing Ted, Robin, and Barney had where they hung out all the time despite Ted and Barney both having had serious relationships with Robin couldn't keep working the way it was. So all season we've been watching and waiting for this to happen and last night, following the end of Robin's relationship with Kevin and Ted realization that he's hit rock bottom and has pretty much abandoned his quest for love (Plus, he's rather drunk.), it happened. Ted told Robin he loved her once more. But before we get to that let's backtrack a bit and talk about...
What Happened, Yo!:

-Barney is angry with Ted, because while he acted as Ted's wingman on a date Ted went on the previous night, Barney found Quinn (The friend of the woman Ted was on a date with) was immune to all his tricks, and told him some things about himself he was surprised she knew. Ted now has to give Barney three hours of his time, and when Marshall and Lily tell them about the Drunk Train (The last train from New York to Long Island full of desperate barflies) Barney decides they will go there.

-The train seems promising the first time out, so they go a second time but every girl they hit on angrily rejects them. Meanwhile, Barney keeps complaing about Quinn. After trying to crack the secret of the drunk train, they realize they have to be drunk to be successful. The third time turns out to be the charm, but Barney turns down the two girls who come onto them. Ted realizes after Barney reveals that he and Quinn did end up sleeping together that Barney is complaining because he likes her and Ted encourages her to go get her, because unlike all the other lonely people on this train, Barney has chance at something more. Barney seemingly ignores Ted, but we later see him ignore a one night stand.

-Meanwhile Kevin and Robin go to a couple's retreat in Vermont with Marshall and Lily. Marshall and Lily tell them the key to a good relationship is to avoid scorekeeping (Though we see that Marshall and Lily do plenty of scorekeeping themselves, especially 8 months later when the baby has come). Later on, Kevin proposes but Robin can't give him an answer. Thinking it's because of her secret that she can't accept his proposal, Robin comes clean to Kevin about her inability to have children (She also tells Marshall and Lily) who still proposes. She accepts, but after Kevin proposes again once she clarifies that she never wants to have kids, she becomes worried that this issue (Kevin wants kids) will come up down the line and Kevin will come to regret his decision. Getting him to really press the issue, Robin and Kevin end their relationship.

-Ted finds Robin on the roof. She tells Ted that she's worried that there is no one out there for her. Ted tells her he could be the one and tells her he loves her.

-In the tag, it turns out Quinn complains about Barney to her friends as much as Barney complains to Ted. And it's revealed the reason she knows that he always wears suits, has a rule for everything, and spends most nights alone in a strip club is because she is a stripper at the club, with the stripper name Karma, that Barney just doesn't recognize.

I Like This:

Wow. The Drunk Train really throws us a curveball at the end and even though it was hinted something like this was coming, I'm still not sure how I feel about it. So I'll talk about the rest of the episode first, starting with Barney and Quinn. I must say Quinn makes a much stronger impression than Norah ever did. I liked the flashbacks to Barney's night with Quinn (which also shows us how Ted has become kinda Barney-like in his efforts to sleep with women, which plays into the episodes climax) and the reveal that she knew things about Barney, not because she could tell by looking at him, but because she actually knew Barney because she was a stripper was a stroke of genius. I'm still rooting for Robin to be the bride at the wedding Ted meets the mother at, but after one episode, I wouldn't be angry if it was Quinn. Also, the idea of the drunk train, filled with Jersey Shore rejects was very funny. As was Barney's elaborate equation (Did he go to MIT? Who knows.) trying to crack the secret.

The rest of the stuff was more dramatic, but it had it's comedic moments. I enjoyed Marshall and Lily trying to avoid making references to marriage and the flashforward to their scorekeeping. Kevin never made much of an impression on me, so I'm not sad that he broke up with Robin, and I actually liked the way it was handled. Robin not wanting and not being able to have kids is a major issue and a natural reason for a relationship to end. As for those final moments, I didn't hate Ted's declaration of love for Robin

But... I don't want to see Ted dating Robin again for more than an episode. Maybe two, if it's handled well. You're playing with fire here HIMYM writers.

The Bottom Line: The Drunk Train was a solid episode, and the ending leaves me wanting to see what happens next, but I'm also apprehensive. Depends on how it's handled.

Grade: 78% (Good)

Memorable Moments

-Lily: "If we were keeping score, Marshall would owe me big time for killing my cousin's dog!" Marshall: "How was I supposed to know the dog would eat my wallet?!" Lily: "Why was your wallet full of chocolate?!"

-Lily once dragged Marshall to an experimental play entitled Nothing But Screaming. Guess what all the dialogue was?

-Barney is thrown off his game: "Ted, tonight is gonna be Epic- wait for it...Dary! Wait that's not it, how do I usually say it?"

-Ted: "Last week I went out with a girl whose favorite band was Glee!"

The Office: Special Project

What Happened, Yo!:

-Pam returns from Maternity Leave, but is quickly overshadowed by Angela who is skipping out on Maternity Leave, has lost most of her pregnancy weight, and has brought everyone in the office treats. Pam tries to hand out cash, but Jim stops her.

-Dwight has been promoted and put in charge of a special team, which will be going to Florida for three weeks to work on launching the Sabre version of the Apple Store, because Sabre wants to get into the retail market. Dwight is tasked with assembling his team and picks Angela, Daryl, Oscar, Phyllis and Toby to go with him. Andy tells him he has too many essential people on the team and will only let him take Phyllis and Daryll, plus Kathy, Kelly, and Kevin. Dwight is angry about this, so he reveals the Florida plan to the whole office in order to rile them up. Dwight gets Andy to agree to let everyone who wants to go prepare a pitch on why they should go.

-Jim gets a text from Robert California telling him they should hit the golf course when Jim goes to Florida. Jim tries to get out of going, but Robert sees his refusal to go as a joke and Pam tells him he should go. Dwight and Andy don't want Jim to go (Dwight doesn't like Jim and Andy sees Jim as essential) but the text from Robert makes them have to put Jim on the team.

-The final team is Dwight, Jim, Stanley, Ryan, Erin, and Kathy. Dwight is angry about this and has an orientation emphasizing all the bad parts of Florida, in an effort to make them all quit. No one quits though, and when Dwight leads their initial planning/expectations meeting, he is surprised to see that the members of the team are actually pretty capable and have some good ideas. Dwight decides that in the hands of a good manager, this could be a great team.

-Meanwhile, Val gives Daryl a Beanie for Valentine's Day. Daryl gets her an overtly romantic gift to test how she feels about him, but when he realizes she made a beanie for everyone in the warehouse, he pretends the gift (Cashmere Gloves) were for Nate, who is excited to get them. Daryl later gets a call from Val's Boyfriend who was trying to get the address for shipping so he could send her flowers. Daryl is depressed, but when Val claims the flowers were from our mom, even when Daryl reveals he got a call from a deep-voiced fellow named Brandon, Daryl realizes that his beanie is a love beanie.

-On Valentine's Day, Erin is disappointed that Andy is still dating Jessica and gets to thinking they'll never get back together. So she lobbies hard to get on the Florida trip, saying she needs to clear her head, and confides to the camera that she's not planning on returning.

-As the group prepares to leave, Kathy is seen telling a person on the phone that Jim's marriage isn't working and implying she's going to make an advance of some sort on him.


I Like This: Special Projects was a great episode and probably my favorite of the season so far. This season has been good, but kind of directionless so a multi-episode arc with Dwight, Jim, Stanley, Erin, Ryan, and Kathy in Florida could be to this season what the Michael Scott Paper Company arc was for season 5 (which was also directionless for much of it). Dwight was on fire this week. It's good to know the return of his managerial ambitions this season (particularly in Trivia) have actually been building up to this arc and I'm excited to see how Dwight and company do in Florida. And although Kathy has been a pointless, semi-mute character so far (To the point that the show pointed this out multiple times this episode), her plans to seduce Jim should make for some cringe-worthy awesomeness. Also good this week was Daryl's storyline of trying to figure out how Val feels about him. I'm a big fan of the ongoing Daryl/Val romantic plot and the reveal of Val's boyfriend, followed by Val lying about where the flowers came from add a nice twist to the proceedings. Nate was also on fire this week, and is well on the way to becoming a Creed-level figure of hilarity. Finally, Erin's plans to never return from Florida are intriguing and hopefully this development finally gets the Andy/Erin romance back on track.

But...: No real issues this week, which is a good sign in my eyes.


The Bottom Line: Special Project is a smashing start to what promises to be a great story arc for The Office.

Grade: 87% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-Dwight: "What are you doing here? You just had our baby! Our... collective Dunder Mifflin family baby.

-Pam: "Oh, Angela. Those brownies have walnuts in them and I think Kevin's allergic to walnuts. You're allergic to walnuts, right Kevin?" Kevin: "Extremely, but I'm gonna fight through it".

-Dwight: "Kevin? Kelly? Kathy? Andy just gave me a chain with three weak links. Have you ever tried to use a chain with three weak links? I have and now I no longer own an artic wolf."

-Val's Boyfriend: "So could I get that address?" Daryl: "yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. I'm just looking for a pen". V.B: "WWhy do you need a pen?" Daryl: "Back off! I have my reasons."

-Meredith: "Wait, Kathy gets to go? Why does she even still work here? Pam is back!" My thoughts exactly, Meredith.

-Dwight: "Hey, be proud of your enormous monster baby. I was once an enormous monster baby".

-Stanley: "If anybody's going to Florida, it should be me. Every shirt that I have that isn't a work shirt is a Tommy Bahama. I'm the only one in the office who watches Burn Notice!"

-Dwight: "What's that? It's not up to me? I only have influence? Well that's all Baltzer Gladfield had. And now nobody eats owls for Thanksgiving."

-Dwight: "Powerpoints are the peacocks of the business world. All show, No meat."

-Dwight: "Wow, Seasonal Affective Disorder, AKA S.A.D. That sounds like a very real thing, Toby." Rainn Wilson's delivery of this line killed me.

-Stanley: "Florida Stanley smiles. Florida Stanley is happy to go to work. Florida Stanley is who you want on your Florida team." Also, Florida Stanley's outfit is ridiculous.

-Jim to Dwight: "Hey, quick question. Do you shower at night or do you shower in the morning. Because I want to shower when you're showering to save some water".

-Dwight: "Have any of you ever seen the documentary, Deliverance?"

-Nate: "They're Nate Coupons. Or Napons. And they're all different. Cash that one in and I will bring you a stick of gum. Anytime, anyplace... I'll find you.

-Daryl: "Your mom's name is Brandon?" Val: "Yeah, Daryl. My mom's name is Brandon."

-Kelly: "I don't know how I'm gonna live here without you." Ryan: "Me neither. Hey, will you put this coat on my chair. I just realized I'm not gonna need it down there." Kelly: "Yes, I will take your coat, and I will keep it with me, and I will sleep with it because it smells like you." Ryan: "No, no no, just put it in my chair."

Glee: The Spanish Teacher: An Abridged Opinion

I'm a bit short on time this week, so I'm going to do a opinion of last night's Glee without the recap I usually put into these posts and a bit shorter than it might otherwise be. So, it's like a quicky opinion for those of you who regularly read my blog, except I'm calling it an Abridged Opinion.

Last night's Glee focused on an aspect of the show that has been ignoring for a while: Will is also a Spanish Teacher. And as frustrating as it was to learn that he doesn't actually know Spanish and has apparently forgotten he won Teacher of the Year one time (as shown in a yearbook picture Emma was fawning over in episode 1. I don't forget these things, Glee!) so he could be shown as a poor educator, I did appreciate his arc over the episode, as he became more of an intentional jerk in his efforts to have Glee do Latin Music Week so he can get tenure, only to get a reality check from Santana (who complained about him because he was projecting stereotypes about her culture to people who didn't know better) and how he stepped aside to let guest star Ricky Martin become the Spanish teacher. I also enjoyed Ricky Martin, who was a delight as David Martinez.

As for the other stuff, Sue was on fire this week and I enjoyed her plot about wanting to have a child. I also like that Finn and Rachel's engagement is treated as a bad idea by most of the characters who hear about it, because it definitely is a bad idea. I liked the scene with Kurt giving Finn the college literature and am more excited to see where this is all going than ever. And I liked how Emma (who was showing off her amusing pamphlets all episode) wound up being the one getting tenure. Because Will and Sue definitely didn't deserve it and giving it to Roz Washington who we barely know would've been a bit of a cop out. The ending was sweet too. Over all, solid episode of Glee.

Grade: 77% (Good)

Memorable Moments

-Best Musical Number: La Isla Bonita definitely was the stand-out this week.

-Worst Musical Number: La Cucharacha and A Little Less Conversation were really bad, but they were meant to be bad, so I'm gonna go with Sexy and I know It, because I don't care for that song in English, let alone in Spanish.

-Sugar continues to amuse me every week with her crazy outfits, reactions, and background comedy.
 Her random push-ups was probably the best part of Sexy and I Know It.

-The old History Teacher was forced to retire after some memory issues started showing up. "And that's how Germany won World War II".

-One last thing: I still don't really care for the Mercedes/Sam/Shane love triangle at this point, because outside of a couple scenes in Asian F, Shane doesn't have an identity outside of Mercedes' Boyfriend Who Is An Obstacle For Sam, so I can't empathize with Mercedes dilemma because I don't know what she sees in Shane.

How I Met Your Mother: The Burning Beekeeper

What Happened, Yo!:

-Lily and Marshall are throwing a housewarming party on Marshall's first night off in a long time. Lily tells her father that she knows he is going to ruin it. They also find out that as part of a new business venture, Mickey is keeping 10,000 bees in the basement.

-Later at the party, Ted and Robin arrive and set the oven for five minutes to heat up the appetizers they brought. Future Ted informs us that in five minutes, everything at the party went wrong and takes us through it room by room.

-In the living room, Marshall is informed by his boss that they have to go back to work in 45 minutes, even though it is their night off. Mickey tries to work his bees into the conversation and goes off to get his beekeeper suit. Mr. Cootes gets angry at Ted for apparently eating from the vegan plate when Ted wasn't a vegan.  Ted denies this until Robin comes in. Then he takes responsibility for it and almost gets into a fight with Mr. Cootes until Lily sends Mr. Cootes to different vegan food elsewhere. Barney (who earlier had dismissed a scream coming from another room as nothing) comes in, drinks Lily and Ted's drinks and starts babbling about whether he should do something. Robin tries to talk to him about it, but Barney just goes on about his Penis before going off. Marshall brings in some fancy Gouda but Lily later smashes it and tells Robin the party is ruined. Robin points out that other people seem to be having an amazing time and when Lily admits it might not be all bad, a man in a flaming beekeeper suit runs through the room.

-Five minutes before this in the dining room, Barney is chatting up a kind of crazy, recently divorced woman and has eaten 20 of the vegan spring rolls. When Mr. Cootes wonders who ate all of them, Barney points him in Ted's direction. The divorced women tells Barney to meet her in the guest bedroom for sex in 2 minutes. Marshall tells Lily he is going to talk to Mr. Cootes about the way he's treating employees, but he tries to get Robin to practice screaming at him first. Robin seems a bit weird about it though, insists she doesn't get mad about every little thing and holds back getting mad about no hot mustard for the pigs in blankets. Barney comes in from the kitchen disturbed and asks Robin to talk to him about it. Robin says fine as long as it's not about his Penis. Marshall goes to talk to his boss and Lily tells Ted she is freaking out about parenthood and wonders if she can do it with all the late hours Marshall is working. She's also concerned about putting out crisis' every thirty seconds and has to get Mickey to go take off his kerosene-doused bee suit (She also learns his bees have escaped). She goes to stop Marshall's gouda. Marshall tells Ted the long hours won't be a problem for him anymore and Ted seems happy when he mentions Robin's been acting weird. Marshall calls the affair a great party when a burning beekeeper walks through the room.

-Five minutes ago (again), in the kitchen, Ted and Robin put in the appetizers and continue their fight. Ted is mad because Robin yelled at a 90-year-old lady at the supermarket (and ripped her wig off) and Robin is mad because Ted never stands up for himself. Ted leaves the kitchen angry and Robin makes an effort not to be mad when Mickey bumps into her and almost spills her drink. Mickey puts on his beekeeper suit and Barney tells him the 'fact' that bees hate the smell of kerosene. Lily tells Barney the women he was talking to is their neighbor and she once cut off the penis of a man who didn't call her back after sleeping with her. Panicking when Barney says he's supposed to sleep with her shortly, she drops the Gouda on the floor and mice crawl on it causing her to scream. Barney opens the door and says everything's fine. Barney gets Lily a glass of wine. Lily is still upset and leaves. Marshall tries to convince Mr. Cootes to not work all the time, but he won't listen so Marshall quits and leaves with the Gouda. Mr. Cootes confides to Mickey (who is taking off his suit) that maybe he needs a hobby and Mickey tries to turn him on to beekeeping. Mr. Cootes rejects his offer but decides to try on the suit. Mickey asks him to close the basement door and leaves. Mr. Cootes then opens the oven to get the appetizers, igniting the kerosene and setting him on fire. He runs all the way outside and jumps in the snow.

-Mr Cootes is fine and has never felt more alive. He decides to give Marshall the night off after all and asks if he'll see him Monday. Marshall agrees. Mr. Cootes then remembers he never closed the basement door and Marshall opens the house to find it full of bees. Barney does wind up sleeping with the women, who is crazy. As he tries to sneak out, he notices the house is full of bees. He escapes anyways.

I Liked This: The Burning Beekeeper was one of those elaborate How I Met Your Mother episodes where nothing quite makes sense at first, but you figure out what's going on as it goes along and by the end, you're impressed by how clever it all is. The device of showing us what happened room by room was a good way of making us figure things out as we go along and definitely rewards a second viewing once you know the whole picture. It was also a good episode with plenty of laughs, from Ted's confrontation with Mr. Cootes, to Mickey's complete inexperience with handling bees. And the ultimate reveal that the oven timer that was counting down how long until things went wrong actually was the catalyst for the ignition of the bee suit was great.

But...: As clever as the structure was, on initial viewing I often got distracted just trying to keep track of everything that was happening and how that would affect other things that had happened, which hampered my enjoyment of the episode a bit. In addition, the party never really wound up becoming quite the disaster that was promised. Though thousands of bees loose in the house is pretty bad.

The Bottom Line: The Burning Beekeeper was a clever (Though sometimes distracting) episode of How I Met Your Mother, which shows the writers still have tricks up their sleeves.

Grade: 70% (Good)

Memorable Moments

-The best reveal of the structure was probably why Lily wanted to destroy the Gouda. Plus it double-worked because the mice were set up in the opening scene. Chekov's Mice, anyone?

-Mickey: "I’m starting up a business cultivating all organic, artisanal honey. That’s right, I’m a job creator.”

-Mr. Cootes: “Your breath reeks of shredded carrots and deceit.” The reveal that Barney had actually ate all the spring rolls and then sent Mr. Cootes after Ted was great too.

-Barney: “Every penis is a girl, Robin. Everyone knows that. Like ships and lake monsters. “

-Ted: “You called her a whore!” Robin: “Who wears that much makeup?!” Ted: “Old ladies.” Robin: “Who trade sex for money!”

Smash: Pilot

Tonight, after months of promos and a couple weeks of it already being available online, Smash makes it's debut. Now, since it's been online for a few weeks, I've already seen it (a couple times) and so will be talking about it now. If you're reading this and haven't seen it yet, some mild spoilers follow, though nothing that major.

The Premise, Yo!:

Smash is the story of Julia and Tom, a successful Broadway writing duo who are planning on taking a break from that whole scene, when they're inspired to do a musical on the life of Marilyn Monroe. They do a demo with Ivy Lynn, a dancer (and seasoned Broadway performer waiting for her big part) from their most current show, just for fun, but it's soon leaked online and becomes a sensation. Before they know it, they have a producer, and a director (Though not everyone is happy with the choice of director) and are holding try-outs to find a Marilyn. Tom favours Ivy Lynn for the role, but Karen Cartwright, a unknown from Iowa trying to make it in the theatre world (with little success) also catches everyone's eye, and gets a callback, which goes well (Though Ivy's goes well too). Karen and Ivy are now in competition for the lead role. In addition, there's a lot of personal stuff and subplots going on, like how Julia's involvement in the musical strains her plans to adopt a child with her husband, and how producer Eileen is going through a divorce, which could have serious consequences for the financing of the musical.

I Liked This: First things first, Smash is definitely, definitely different from Glee. And that's a good thing. The world can barely handle one Glee, let alone two of them. The world of broadway is definitely a good idea to base a series on, and based on this pilot, Smash is off to a great start. The characters are all fairly grounded and easy to invest in. Karen (played by Katharine McPhee) in particular, is very likeable and easy to root for. The writing is solid. Most of the conflict introduced so far feels natural and it should be interesting to see this all play out over the course of the season. And also, the songs are great, and staged beautifully. The climax of the episode with all the characters involved in the play heading for callbacks, while Karen and Ivy sing original song Let Me Be Your Star is very powerful, incredibly cinematic, and a great way to conclude the pilot. And The National Pastime is just a delight. The pilot also does a good job setting everything up, while remaining entertaining in and out of itself.

But...: The pilot does drag in places. The adoption subplot isn't that interesting, and seems kind of superfluous so far. And Karen's parents are pretty cliche oppressive parents right now.

The Bottom Line: Overall, Smash makes a strong first impression, with a (mostly) great pilot. Here's hoping the show only improves as it goes on.

Grade: 85% (Great)

Memorable Moments

-One quick thing: I will be talking about Smash every week. Unless there's some kind of crazy unforseen circumstance of course. I love me a good musical and Smash is set up to be a good musical.